The most hated of all activities for her was attending tution classes. She detested Mathematics and the idea of dealing with it every morning made her cringe.
She would cycle her way to do those tution classes, morose. She knew the subject was interesting and now she realises that if she had tried, maybe things would have been better but who could make her understand this back then. She was a free bird who found the world of numbers limiting. The only things that pleased her were stories and poems which let her imagination soar high.
There was one particular fellow mate who saved her from getting whip lashes. He would secretly provide her with answers and that too in an indirect way. It was on one rarer occasion that she got to interact with him. She being an introvert was expecting him to begin the conversation, little did she know that he was an introvert himself. He kept staring at her and all that she could manage to say was thank you, for what he never asked and she never explained. This set the course of their friendship.
Came the last year of high school, he suddenly started behaving in a bossy way. He wouldn't allow anyone to occupy the seat next to her, would grow morose if she didn't talk with him. She was noticing everything but couldn't forsee that he had fallen for her. The day he told her that, she felt shivers. She began crying unable to understand what had gone wrong. She didn't want their friendship to suffer. She told him , he shouldn't expect which was beyond friendship. She told him, she was not meant for love.
It killed her to see him suffer, he was growing insecured. He wanted to keep her out of the reach of the whole world but he had forgotten that she was a free bird, she was not meant to be caged.
So, he striked a deal that they were to stay best of friends for the rest of their lives and she happily obliged. With time, things changed. Both of them changed, their priorities got shifted but one phone call from him was enough for both of them to re-live those past memories. Things were fine, atleast she thought that they were going to be such for the rest of their lives but as they say, life keeps on giving jolts. Their story suffered jolts as well. She saw newer associations enter his life and she was happy to see him move on but each time she became friends with people, he would grow insecure. He was simply growing obsessed. He wanted to hold the keys to her life and she couldn't handle this idea.
There were days when he would blame her for things which never were her decision. He would fling harsh words at her and she would silently absorb everything, she still didn't want their friendship to suffer. But the day he started tightening the straps in the name of friendship, she began to feel suffocated. He no longer was the same warm person who was ready to shield her no matter how grim the situation could be. He no longer could stand her smiling and gifted her tears in every possible ways. The last day she heard from him was the day he had asked her to get lost, and she did get lost. She let him off her life, off her memory.
It's been years and it hurts her to think of those sweet days but never does she repent her decision. She chose to love herself to the extent that she couldn't allow anyone to hurt her self esteem. She forever vowed to stay at the fringes and never be a part of any story for it had pained real hard when he had asked her to walk away.
Comments
Post a Comment